January 2011
34 posts
2 tags
Driving with Amber
["I got you babe" comes on the radio]
Me: Hand [Start holding hands and singing]
Amber: What are you doing? You know you're Cher
Me: [Stops singing while she sings Sonny's part]
Yoga on the Wii Fit is actually fun
Have Pandora on and strengthing my core… Maybe I need more friends for a Friday night
Girl: So I have a question I have to ask you
Me: Alright
Girl: How can you tell if someone is Bi-sexual
Me: I Don't know
Girl: Come on you're suppose to know
Me: Do they look greedy and confused.
“Oh honey, classy girls always puke to the left. Do you feel alright.”
– Me [Last night after my friend threw up on herself]
“Stop organizing life around people who don’t get the joke. Fuck them if they...”
– Bill Maher
[via allow : passthemike]
(via drinkyourjuice)
We're all drinking cherry vodka cocktails and...
Sitting in a training class
and instead of paying attention i am playing with the new mac computers
4 tags
My opinion on "The Dark Knight Rises"
Since I am a nerd with a blog, i believe by law everything i say is correct and everyone should listen to me…
not really, but I think Anne Hathaway is a decent choice for Selina Kyle. Not the best choice but waaay better than Jessica biel because she can not act. i never thought heath ledger as the joker would be good but with the right dierction I’m sure anne hatahway will portray a...
Dragged my 13 year old brother into the bathroom...
Him: Owwww, owww you're pulling my hair
Me: I wouldn't have to if you would just wash it, beauty is pain
Him: The water's too hot
Me: Don't care your hair is too filthy. It's fucking gross. Pretty clean boys get dates. You know what dirty smelly boys get?
Him: What?
Me: NOTHING, they get personal hand time. Now rinse
[He rinses and then tries to leave]
Me: where are you going
Him: you're finished
Me: No now we have to condition it
Him: There's another step
Me: ewwww yes there's another step.
How I'm going to spend my day off
Lunch with David
Ignore my reading for my History of Michigan class
Play Pokemon Stadium on my N64 all day
My sex life consists of Tumblr, wine, and video...
add in Netflix and you’ll have my nightly orgies
1 tag
“I can’t believe she just brought out carrots. Who even eats canned...”
– David [our waitress tonight was awful she didn’t take our drink orders or ask us which vegetable we wanted]
Just had the best meal of my life
left over pizza, a bunch of oreos, two pork chops and a chocolate chip cupcake… The girls I had class with today thought it was a better idea to get high on our break then go get lunch. I could’ve gnawed my arm off during my last class.
Stuck watching live to dance because David wants...
The little kid dance group came on and david screamed this gem: “Give them penis little boy serve it up, put it in her mouth” apparently he wanted to see him undulate his hips more with some Latin heat
School starts tomorrow...
Blah
I Might Have Been Born Just Plain White Trash, But...
Had dinner with my mother today
it was fun we played the yoga on Wii fit then she tricked me into watching a documentary on intelligent design
Me: [once it was over] I can’t believe I watched a film on intelligent design, I should have read the back of that DVD more carefully. Mom: What you mean you were raised in the church and don’t believe in intelligent design? Me: NOOOO, Have you met me?
Opened a letter today
It said if I got a tax return this year I should use it to pay the government to clear my record so I don’t get arrested. I was actually frightened for a moment until I realized I haven’t done anything illegal besides downloading music, television and porn while my father with the same name as me is a complete asshole screw-up who went to jail twice last year for possession of crack,...
“I’m looking for the episode where the girl gets gang banged that is soo...”
– David [Watching Nip/tuck, we just got Netflix]
Ham
tomyhusband:
If we have ham and you leave less than three slices in the package, you should just stab me in my sleep. What am I supposed to do with less than three pieces of ham? Dry my tears?
Dying my hair again
bored so I’m adding red to it, it was that or another piercing
Michigan is really is a lot of fun…
SOOO, I have a new roommate
An 18 year old guy I work with was kicked out of his house and needed a place to stay until he finishes high school and enters the marines. I’ve hung out with him before and he was cool but now I think I may have some reservations about living with someone I work with, that whole saying don’t poop where you eat comes into mind.
So my laptop officailly died and will not even...
and I borrowed my old one from highschool which is now my mothers…so for now no porn which you might as well tell me not to breath